User blog:Brainulator9/Plants vs. Zombies Unsoiled: Kurse of the Kernel
After the baseball zombies catapult the Gold Sunflower Trophy, bad things (to them, at least) happen.
(READY SET PLANT!)
(the player, or homeowner as I call him, plants a Kernel-pult)
Homeowner: Aw, man!
Kernel-pult: What's the matter?
Homeowner: For some reason, I can never collect coins. Therefore, I am stuck at 994,440 moolah.
Kernel-pult: Moolah?
Homeowner: That's what I'm calling it...
Kernel-pult: (blinks)
Homeowner: ...for now.
Kernel-pult: Hmmm...
Time card: Meanwhile...
Catapult Baseball Zombie: On the count of three!
Baseball Zombie horde: (fast) One, two, three!
(the Catapult Baseball Zombie hurls the Gold Sunflower Trophy into the pool)
All in the scene: YEAH!!!! (in the same tone as Dora the Explorer. I don't care if you don't like it, it's just an allusion.) ♪We did it! We did it!♪ (now in the tone of Conga) ♪We did it, did it, did it! Did it, did it, did it!♪ WE DID IT!
Baseball Zombie 1: And it was more successful than last time...
(a flashback occurs showing a Baseball Zombie eating a Gold Sunflower Trophy only to be blown up just before the sixth bite)
Baseball Zombie 2: And that wasn't worth it.
Baseball Zombie 3: But the good thing is that a trophy was destroyed.
Baseball Zombie 1: As an effigy?
Baseball Zombie 3: Yes, yes it was.
Catapult Baseball Zombie: Let's just go away and no evil spirits are up to haunt us.
(during that last line, Kernel-pult is revealed to have been listening and watching the event)
Kernel-pult: Homeowner?
Homeowner: Yes?
Kernel-pult: Use Cheat Engine to make them lose.
Homeowner: Okay.
(A montage shows them (the zombies) "tryin'-n-dyin'", as I call it.)
Homeowner: Somehow, I can't win with this curse in the way.
Kernel-pult: Neither can the zombies.
Homeowner: When will you lift this curse?
Kernel-pult: When they find the trophy.
(another montage plays, this time showing various failed attempts to retrieve the trophy, one of which includes a Snorkel Baseball Zombie jumping into the pool... and drowning)
Zombies: Okay, WE GIVE UP!
Kernel-pult: Good!
(the 30th home run is shot and all zombies die. the homeowner picks up a new Gold Sunflower Trophy, subsequently bringing him to the maximum amount of money)
Kernel-pult: I guess I can lift the curse. Go to Cheat Engine.
Homeowner: Yes, sir!
Time card: 25 years later:
(remember that Snorkel Baseball Zombie that drowned? He survived.)
Baseball Snorkel Zombie: Hey, what's this? (gasps) IT'S THE GOLD SUNFLOWER TROPHY intact. I should bring this to the surface. (surfaces) Hey, guys, I FOUND THE TROPHY! THE LONG LOST TROPHY! Hello? Anyone? (notices the home is a museum) Maybe I can donate this.
Tell me what you think!