User blog:Moon Snail/Ranking every PvZ2 Premium plant from worst to best

Heya! So, I've seen a few youtube videos in this style, so what if I made a blog about this? Here's a list of all 31 premium plants, from the virtually unusable to the gods of all plants. Also, quick note, but I won't be including Gemiums in this list, just the premiums. If people like this, I might do one on gemiums. Anyway, no more thyme wasting, let's rock!

31 and 30th place: The king and queen of trash.

These are the easy ones. These two plants are the bottom of the Barrel of Deadbeards in terms of premiums. They only kill one zombie at a time, which is nearly useless when the biggest threat in the game is huge packs of zombies. Sure, they can kill some high-health threats like Pharaohs and materialhead zombies, but with the mass of instakill and high-damage plants, that barely matters.

"BUT SNAIL MAN!" I hear you screaming, "Isn't Toadstool better than Chomper?" Well, hear me out. First of all, who cares? She's still nearly useless. Second of all, I wouldn't say she's "better". Sure, she has extra range and makes sun, but she's more expensive and seems to do less damage to gargs (Correct me if I'm wrong). But most importantly, Chomper's Plant Food effect is far better. Chomper swallows 3 zombies and blows back the rest on the lane. Sure, Fume-shroom's PFE is better for the most part, but damn, Chomper's is good. What does Toadstool do? Swallows at most 4 zombies in a 3x5 radius and produces 200 sun. This sounds okay on paper, but in reality, if the zombies are in a 3x5 range and you need to use this, maybe you shouldn't be using Toadstool anyway. Plus, if there aren't 4 zombies in that range, she just swallows a small amount of zombies. Worst of all, this PFE glitched on me on multiple occasions, where she'd just keep her mouth open for extended periods of time, turning into nothing but a 200-sun bite blocker. Dare I say, Chomper is better than Toadstool for this fact alone, but if I listed him higher than Toadstool, people would probs be b****ing on my talk page for months. But needless to say, these two plants are some of the worst, if not, the worst plants in PvZ2.

29. We're (not) gonna be a movie star!

Of all the PvZ1 plants to be returned as a premium plant, why Starfruit? Nobody (For the most part) liked this plant in the first game. But regardless, it's just as bad in this game, except worse, since he costs 25 sun more... for some reason! Worse, still, is that they released a similar plant that does more damage, and has a less odd shooting range! This plant is just so bad...

28. Damn(delion) you, EA!

Of ALL the gemiums in the game, of ALL of them, you chose the worst one to turn Premium? Why did you even turn a gemium into a premium!? Anyway... Ever since Dusk Lobber came out, this thing has become completely useless. NEXT!

27. An apple a day keeps your brains away!

It's kinda like Dusk Lobber! And it's a premium! So it has to be an upgrade, right?

Haha... no.

If you legitimately think that Apple Mortar is better than Dusk Lobber after extensive usage of both, you don't really need any plant. The zombies only attack people with brains, after all. Sure, Apple Mortar has stun, and doesn't need a Moonflower (Like it's a fuss to use the best sun producer in the game, amirite?), but... No splash. Not even a wimpy splash like Dandelion's. This kills Apple Mortar. Dusk Lobber has some great splash damage that makes her one of the best plants period. Apple Mortar's stun isn't that good anyway. It's just a half a second. Okay, this plant isn't peashooter-levels bad, but it's still one of the biggest wastes of money you could get in this game.

To be continued.